A second open latter to Part Time Working Mummy
I’ve had a look at Louisa Zissman’s stories after reading about them on MOD’s thread. I’m so glad she’s understanding what Tattle is all about… it’s just gossip, with some unpleasant comments that are easy to scroll past and some valid, articulate discussions regarding our concerns about some of these influencers.
I’m intrigued at PTWM’s sudden decision to have a social media break – probably the first time she’s done so and that phone is glued to her hand… could it be that she’s concerned about the press catching on to the PayPal scandal? About how her followers set up a PayPal donation account to save PTWM’s house – but no one knows where those donations have gone to? They’re still renting the house.
Could it be that she’s worried that the press will find out that she’s lied about the ‘stranger on the bridge’ and ‘the young mum in Mothercare’ stories that were shared thousands of times and propelled her to this platform as a Champion of Vulnerable Women?
Is she panicking that Tattlers are finally getting recognition for not being a group of vipers and trolls as she regularly spouts, but that we are a group of honest, decent women (mostly, am sure there are men, too) who are sick of these scammers. Sick of these social media influencers shoving #ad after #ad at us when we can’t afford that lifestyle. Portraying this wonderful family life when they’re #gifted this and that. STOP.
PTWM is an ambassador for Kidscape yet her young daughter has a TicToc account; by the way new readers and lurkers… Tattlers found that video of PTWM dancing on TicToc first and PTWM saw it was shared here – that’s why she uploaded it, to ‘normalise it’. The reason we were appalled though was PTWM had just written a long post about not being able to move after ‘having her stomach sliced in two’ but she was dancing with her daughter? Then we were concerned and toyed with the idea of contacting school – because of T’s public TicToc account. We debated this and decided against it, so no-one did. Not one of us here reported it to the school.
PTWM has built her name on being a Domestic Abuse advocate. And this here is where I became a Tattle member as that is my background. A DA advocate does not invite vulnerable victims into their home and nor do they show pictures of these women (and their children) on their social media accounts. I was appalled at the lack of safeguarding PTWM displayed – inviting strangers into her home – we as support workers of vulnerable service users are not allowed to disclose our personal details.
We have women telling their partner which refuge they’re in and have the perpetrator turn up, so we have to move her to keep herself and other families safe. What would PTWM have done had this happened at her door? How has she managed to find refuge space for six women in a week when I have to send a woman back to the perpetrator on a Friday afternoon because no refuge in the nearby counties have a space?
An advocate of DA does not film her husband, without his knowledge, and post it without his consent. She posted several stories/videos filming Josh complaining about something related to the family or housework. It was a private conversation between husband and wife but she uploaded them. Now, had a man uploaded videos of his wife complaining – there would be uproar. It would be abusive.
An advocate of DA does not tell her followers the whereabouts of a homeless person’s staying place. Nor do they discuss the fact he has a broken tent. They don’t upload a picture with the cost of a new tent (who’s benefit was that for?); they don’t video the Mother in Law laughing and making fun of a torch that “looks like a tampax”. They don’t say “it’s been a nice day out” when they’ve been out to hand these new camping equipment to the man in question. HE did not ask for his story to be told. HE did not ask for sympathy nor donations. They intruded on his personal space.
PTWM shared a story (and this is how I heard about Tattle), where she was distressed and hurt about some of the comments about her. I wasn’t following PTWM but I was following Knee Deep in Life who wanted everyone to support and love PTWM. Anyway, I was moved by this video of a pregnant vulnerable woman and horrified at Tattle Life. But I’m glad I was nosy enough to come and have a read because I have had my eyes opened so much.
I feel like I could be Wilby’s nanny – I know everything about him. PTWM’s eldest daughter, Betsy, has a boyfriend and PTWM even tags him – why? Where is the safety in this? Her children are constantly filmed. It’s #ad after #ad yet in her rant about Tattle she was crying saying she gives her last £20 to strangers. Hang on a minute… she’s wearing a £250 Stella McCartney coat and Josh has a £250 Stone Roses coat. So – where’s the PayPal donations? She’s able to go on holidays, often eats out. That’s not reflective of the lifestyle of her followers.
Anyone who’s ever tried to ask them about PayPal are ‘blocked’. KDIL even blocked me because I’d ‘liked’ a comment asking where the donations were. Why not be accountable? You can’t put yourself out to the internet and not accept that there will be backlash? You’ve got to be transparent. I’ve found that those who want Tattle to be taken down (PTWM and her husband), usually have something to hide. PTWM’s artist friend even called one of us a ‘c**t’ when asked a question. Is that being kind?
PTWM advocates for kindness but she had an affair with Josh whilst he was married? And for those of you who’ve thought of his ex-wife as some drunk, how many of us would turn to drink if our husband left us on our son’s birthday? And how many of you would turn to drink if you weren’t allowed to see your children but the whole world could, because your sons are always on PTWM’s posts? We know more about S and I than their mother does. How bloody sad?
And that book you’ve all loved reading… did you notice she’d given someone the pseudo name ‘Sam’. Yeah, that’s the ex-wife’s name too. Can we really relate to a woman who writes about her family members for the world to know?
Now, I’m not a viper. I’m someone who’s been in and out of refuges as a child and adult. I was physically beaten by my mum when she was an alcoholic, I was so happy when her partner died of a heroin overdose cos he would have killed my mum, and it would mean no more kicking my bedroom door at night. But I’d never write about this in public because she’s my mum. People would treat her differently. It’s respect. You can’t sell your family.
PTWM had a healthy eating campaign recently but her children regularly have breakfasts in McDonald’s and she’s got an #ad with Nutella?
This woman claims to champion empowerment but she portrays herself as weak, needy and dependent. She phones her husband at his work place when she wants something… she doesn’t do any housework and has the luxury of a cleaner. She forgot to do the online food shop one day and complained about how he kids had to have fruit and yoghurt for breakfast, I work with families who’s children go to school’s Breakfast Club because they don’t have anything in. But she managed to get her nails and lashes done?
Look at the bigger picture and do not be drawn in by this false Instagram social media bullshit. Be critical. Ask yourself if this is true. Does she really work with refuges – or does she simply send #gifted donations on? Does she sit in an office applying for benefits and grants for a mother who’s left an abusive man, does she badger housing associations for a property for a family, does she attend Marac cases and put safety plans in place to stop another woman being murdered?
How many times has she mentioned Rosie Duffield’s speech? Moving, raw… 0 times. How many times has she mentioned the Domestic Abuse Bill? 0 times. But this is her USP?
I work x2 jobs and can’t afford their lifestyle, but I’m fucking honest and hardworking. Tattlers, enjoy your families, your health, love each other and do an act of kindness each day without posting it online. Be real. Warmth, food and a roof. We don’t need designer crap and expensive holidays. We need integrity. Have a lovely day